The Kindness of Neighbors

Dear friends,


My next door neighbor (and very dear friend) Donna called this morning from work, a hint of desperation in her voice. Her son had missed the school bus and all of their other family members who could have taken him were out of town or she couldn't get a hold of them. Would I be able to give him a ride to the local middle school? Sure! It only took 15 minutes, but I know it made a big difference to him and he thanked me as I dropped him off.  His mom has done just as many sweet things for me.  I can't count how many eggs and cups of sugar we've borrowed from her, or the happy afternoons my daughter has spent playing with her little girl.  My next door neighbor on the other side brings us bags of clothes and piles of vintage books that her housecleaning clients give to her, and brings us plates of homemade Christmas cookies each year. Both of my next door neighbors take the time to chat with me, and they put their heart into it and not just their words. All that adds up after 15 years or so!

As I drove Gabriel to school this morning, I was also reminded of when I was a little girl in San Carlos, California nearly 40 years ago. I got sick at school while Mom was at work.  She called the neighbor across the street, who brought me home to her house. I remember lying on Connie's couch and drinking ginger ale to make my tummy feel better. I have often thought of that with warm feelings. I felt cared for! The funny thing is that I have absolutely no other memories of this sweet lady. She's not someone our family did things with socially, to my knowledge, though maybe my mom had more contact with her than I did.  To me, it was just one simple little kindness from a neighbor, but I remember.  Another sweet lady, who lived a few blocks away from us then, holds a special place in my heart, too. You can read about her here: Hazel Waterman.

Small kindnesses count!

~*~*~

"Count that Day Lost"
by George Eliot

If you sit down at set of sun

And count the acts that you have done,
And, counting, find
One self-denying deed, one word
That eased the heart of him who heard,
One glance most kind
That fell like sunshine where it went --
Then you may count that day well spent.


But if, through all the livelong day,
You've cheered no heart, by yea or nay --
If, through it all
You've nothing done that you can trace
That brought the sunshine to one face--
No act most small
That helped some soul and nothing cost --
Then count that day as worse than lost.

~*~*~

 
What neighbors do you remember from your childhood or your early motherhood years?  Who can you show kindness to this week?

Blessings,
Virginia Knowles
http://www.comewearymoms.blogspot.com/

The 12 P's of Stress Busting for Moms

The 12 P's of Stress Busting for Moms
by Virginia Knowles

A decade ago, when I presented these concepts in talks to moms, the leader of a local home school support group asked me how to list it in the church bulletin. She suggested “Stress-Free Home Schooling.” I had to laugh! In my mind, there IS no such thing as Stress-FREE Home Schooling or Stress-FREE Mothering -- at least not in my house with so many active and opinionated children! There were a few years in there when our family encountered several major stress factors at a time, including pregnancy, unemployment, serious illness and death of close family members, a change in churches, and more.

I can tell you that it has been a real struggle to deal with this extra stuff in life, but if we don’t learn how to handle stress wisely, it can destroy us. Some of the negative results of stress are health problems, relational conflicts, and a lack of productivity. Most importantly, it can rob us of the peace and joy that should be ours in Christ. But stress can have a positive effect too, if we use it as a motivation to change something that is wrong. It can spur us on to seek God for fresh strength and vision. It can cause us to evaluate and adjust our lifestyles. And it can drive us to mend and build our relationships. In my life, the extra stress factors have forced me to lean harder on God and look for ways to change our situation.

Let’s talk about some ways that we all can do this. For those of you who like alliteration, we will be taking a whirlwind tour through 12 Stress Busters that start with the letter P. 

(Note: I have also embedded links to several other related blog posts, but I recommend that you read the whole article before you go back and start clicking on the links.  Or, you can right click to open them in a separate window as you see one that interests you, and then read them when you are done with the original article.)

Are you ready?

PRAYER: Prayer is how we seek God’s strength and wisdom for mothering, and how we become equipped for spiritual warfare. Imagine with me.... You enter The Most Holy Place, the throne room of God, and bow before the King. Then after he embraces you and places a comforting hand on your head, he hands you this beautifully wrapped package. Inside are his gifts of Mercy and Grace. They aren’t generic brand either! They are specifically designed for your particular needs that very day. Whatever your problem is, there is the solution. Whatever your grief, there is a unique balm of comfort. What’s even better, his door is open whenever you choose to visit, and he has a different care package for you every time you come. All of these benefits come to you because of your relationship as his daughter through the sacrifice of Jesus. This is not a fantasy scene, ladies! This is what can really truly happen as we come to God in prayer!

Scriptures: Philippians 4:6-7, Ephesians 6, Hebrews 4:15-16
More Reading:

• The Throne Room of Grace
• Praying for Your Children
• Come Weary Moms posts on Prayer
• Dancing With My Father: How God Leads Us into a Life of Grace and Joy
• Busy, Dizzy & In a Tizzy?

PRIORITIES: Are your priorities out of whack? Are the urgent things crowding out the important? The most important priority is to love God with all our hearts, and love others as ourselves. We must teach our children to do the same, while we lavish on them our motherly affection, time, supervision, and help. Remember that EFFICIENCY is doing things the RIGHT WAY, but EFFECTIVENESS is doing the RIGHT THING! It doesn’t really matter how much you can cram into your schedule, or how fancy or how cheaply you can do it if what you are doing is not WORTHWHILE. What is the RIGHT THING for your family?  If you are a home schooling mom, in academic subjects, you need to focus on the basics first: reading, speaking & writing, and math. Then you can add in science, social studies and electives.

Scriptures: Deuteronomy 6:5-7, Titus 2:4-5

More Reading:  

• What is Worth While?
• A Mother’s Seeds poem
• The Thessalonians Prescription

PLANNING: We plan to make sure that our priorities are accomplished. If we rush into the tasks of mothering, home making or home schooling without careful thought to what we want to do and how we want to do it, we can expect to FAIL! Planning includes daily schedule, menu planning, shopping lists, long term goals, detailed step-by-step subgoals, home school lesson plans or curriculum purchase lists, etc.

Scriptures: Isaiah 32:8, Proverbs 21:5

More Reading:

• ADD and Me? We'll Manage!
• Weekly Grading and Lesson Planning

PREPARATION: Preparation is the natural extension of planning, putting it into action. You can talk all you want about what you want to do, but until you start to do it, you won’t get anywhere at all. Get your supplies ready ahead of time, learn the material that you want your children to learn, and teach and demonstrate skills for your children (academic and household) instead of expecting them to know how to do them instinctively.

Scriptures: Proverbs 14:23

More Reading:

• Motherhood Management in Your Home School
• Tribute to Sono Harris: The Legacy of a Joyful Home School Mom

PROBLEM SOLVING: It’s time to look for practical solutions to recurring problems. What is it that bugs you and your family day in and day out? What is it that drives you to tears of frustration or starts fights? Find it and FIX IT! A small change can make a big difference! Research answers to your problems through reading Scripture and other books, and talking with others (including your husband and children). Learn to brainstorm: List all of the possible options, evaluate which ones would be best, and give them a try! If it doesn’t work, try something else! If your home school curriculum is not working right, should you try to make the child work harder at it, modify the curriculum, switch curriculums, or just give it some time? I can't answer that for you!

Scriptures: 1 Peter 5:7, James 1:5

More Reading:

• K.I.S.S. Keep It Simple, Sweetie!
• Problem Solving in Your Home School

PARTNERSHIP: Many times the problem that needs to be solved is that we are trying to be SuperMom and do everything by ourselves! We need to expect, accept and ask for help from others: 

• Husband: leads family, is partner for decision making, can help teach and train children
• Children: learn to work independently, take initiative, help around house
• Willing relatives: help chauffeur, babysit younger children during field trips, take children to cultural events, give educational materials as gifts
• Friends and support groups: offer fellowship and encouragement, give creative ideas and advice, plan group events, provide social opportunities for children
• Teachers and mentors: provide instruction in areas where we are weak, generate enthusiasm for their topics

Scriptures: Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, Proverbs 19:20

More Reading: 

• Calling All Mentors
• Cherishing Your Marriage

PEACEMAKING: Mom, you set the atmosphere in your home. The kind of interactions that you allow will determine whether your home is filled with peace or strife. Model peacemaking with your husband. Insist on respect from your children. Coach children (especially younger ones) through their conflicts, how to avoid a quarrel, how to overlook offenses, how to sincerely apologize, etc. Ask them to think about the quality of their relationships. They are going to be living with their brothers and sisters for several years. Do they really want to live in hostility, or wouldn’t it be more fun to be friends? Do arguing and complaining really make them feel good?

Scriptures: James 3:17-18

More reading:

• Stop, Drop and Roll! (How to Deal with a Conflict)
• True Repentance (It's a Very Good Thing!)  
• Child Discipline or Child Abuse?

PLEASURE: One way that we can reduce stress is to have fun together! We can do things that make us feel happy. When many children think of entertainment, they automatically think of something passive, like television. That’s really limiting our options! Think of all the things you can do as a family without a TV!

Scriptures: Proverbs 17:22

More Reading:

• Bored? What to Do With a TV Off!
• Pure Pleasure: Why Do Christians Feel So Bad About Feeling Good?
• Nurture Your Creativity!
• Arts and Crafts at Home

PRAISE: A sincere word of encouragement can keep everyone moving toward success. It is a law of human nature that people tend to continue doing the things that earn them affirmation and praise. I’m not saying we should flatter our husbands or children or make them think they should only do something good if someone will notice, but we can’t neglect this powerful motivational tool that God has given us. If you praise your children more than you criticize them, it changes the atmosphere in the home. They are more likely to offer a word of encouragement to a brother or sister. What a stress-buster! Some children need extra praise when it comes to academics! The opportunity to give a child instant positive feedback on their efforts is one of the great benefits of home schooling!

Scriptures: 1 Thessalonians 5:11, Proverbs 16:21

More Reading:

• G.K. Chesterton on Gratitude
• The Password of Praise
• Tender Compassion for Mothers

PERSONAL CARE: To keep our bodies and spirits from becoming worn down from the constant demands we face, we must do what it takes to tend to our health. The four main things that usually affect my own health and energy level are: the amount of sleep I get, what I eat and when I eat it, what kind of exercise I am doing, and what my hormones are doing with either my monthly cycles or a childbearing. Most of those health factors are a matter of choices that I make each day. Besides your physical health, you need to pay attention to your mental health, especially if you are prone to depression. You may occasionally enjoy getting away from the house for a few hours in order to think straight or to get together with friends. A hobby can be good for your emotional well-being health, too. Do what it takes to keep your body, mind and spirit in good running order! You need them for the rest of your life! 

Scriptures: Daniel 1:8-14, Psalm 127:2

More reading:

• Morning Walk
• Nurturing Naomi: How to Help Yourself or Someone Else Overcome Discouragement
• You Can Exercise, Too!

PRACTICAL HOMEMAKING: Make your home a haven of rest, not a cesspool of stress. A cluttered room raises irritation and distraction levels, while a tidy one helps you to concentrate and/or relax. Another problem that clutter creates is that we can’t find the supplies that we know we have SOMEWHERE! We need to organize our school rooms so we can locate our materials quickly, and so that things don’t fall off the shelves. The best recommendation I can give you is to buy lots of plastic bins and organize your things into logical categories, such as pencils, stencils, game pieces, rubber stamps, bottles of glue, etc. You may not have a lot of money to decorate your home, but even touching up the paint or hanging a few family photos can perk up a room. We can make our homes pleasant to look at, even on a tight budget!

Scriptures: Proverbs 14:1, Titus 2:5, Proverbs 31

More reading:

• Household Organization: Clutter, Clothes Storage and Chores
• A Place for Everything
• Let Our Ordered Lives Confess the Beauty of Thy Peace…?
• Organizing with Plastic Zip-Style Bags at Home and On the Go

PERSISTENCE: “Try, try, try again!” I know it’s tempting to throw in the towel when the times get tough, but now is not the time to quit on what God has called you to do! There is a blessing he holds in store for those who stick with their commitments! What an example this is to our children when they see us persevere on their behalf! It will help teach them to be faithful in what God has called them to do! Ladies, your labor in the Lord is not in vain. What you are doing in your own homes with your own children will someday affect nations and generations as they go forth from a strong foundation.

Scriptures: 1 Corinthians 15:58

More Reading:

• "My Glorious Dishtowel" Redux and More
• Quotes and Poems to Keep You Going
• Suffering: What Does it Take to Forge Our Character?
• Tough times?

May God bless you richly in this grand and noble adventure!

Vintage Quotes and Cozy Thoughts from Lessons at Blackberry Inn

“A man should hear a little music, read a little poetry, and see a fine picture every day of his life, in order that worldly cares may not obliterate the sense of the beautiful which God has implanted in the human soul.” Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


"The highest reward for a person's toil is not what they get for it, but what they become by it." John Ruskin

"Give me a stout heart to bear my own burdens. Give me a willing heart to bear the burdens of others. Give me a believing heart to cast all burdens upon Thee, O Lord." John Baillie

"How else but through a broken heart may Lord Christ enter in?" Oscar Wilde

"Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God." Corrie tenBoom


"Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so, you apologize for truth." Benjamin Disraeli


"Kindness is in our power, even when fondness is not." Samuel Johnson

I found these quotes at the beginning of chapters in the book Lessons at Blackberry Inn, a novel by Karen Andreola about a New England family who started home schooling in the 1930's. I borrowed this sweet book from my friend Debbie, who loves Charlotte Mason style home schooling, and jotted down my favorite tidbits in my notebook, where I can browse through them every now and then.

Sit yourself down for a spell, and restore your soul! Infused with Charlotte Mason's gentle art of learning, this calming book follows Carol, a 1930s homemaker, as she adjusts to her first year living at Blackberry Inn. Refresh yourself as you drop into her idyllic world of canning, cleaning, homeschooling, baking, and other scenes of faith, hope, hospitality, love, and the lost art of homemaking! Written as a sequel to Pocketful of Pinecones, Lessons at Blackberry Inn may also be read as a stand-alone novel. A delightful treat for the homeschool mother.

I loved the book because it is so full of beauty and warmth, cozy but with a strong dose of reality. It made me want to hunt down a copy of Keeper of the Bees by Jean Stratton Porter (author of The Girl of the Limberlost) which is set in roughly the same era with many similar themes of the beauty of nature, hard work, holistic health, and integrity.  Both of the books talk about bee keeping.  If you want to learn more about honey bees with your kids, click here: Links for Honey Bees.

I also found the country inn setting to be quaint, especially with little extras like a apple butter recipes tucked in. I'm not a big "tea time" mother, but my daughter Rachel, knowing my love for all things Scottish, bought me a package of imported Walkers Shortbread Petticoat Tails for my birthday last week. I shared the last wedges of them with my younger children as I as typed this. I just got up from the computer to make a big pitcher of lemonade. Just a little simple hospitality in the home...

What are your favorite quotes? Post them in a comment for me, please! I would love to make this blog a little more interactive!

Blessings and beauty,

Virginia

http://www.comewearymoms.blogspot.com/

K.I.S.S. Keep It Simple, Sweetie!

Dear friends,

It's hard to believe it's been one year (as of next week) that I started this Come Weary Moms blog!  My heart has always been to bring comfort and encouragement to moms, especially those who are struggling with fatigue, confusion, depression, and anxiety amidst the sometimes overwhelming demands of motherhood.  Sometimes the solutions to our problems are deeply spiritual -- and you will find many posts about such topics.  But sometimes they are just simple and practical.

I'm a busy home schooling mommy of 10 children, ages 5 to 23, with a baby grandson who often comes to visit us, too!  So I don't have the time or energy for anything terribly complicated.  This has been especially apparent since my sister brought up the strong possibility that I, like her, have adult ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder).  You can read about that here: ADD and Me? We'll Manage!

Sometimes the key to making your day run smoother is to eliminate the many little hassles that add up to big frustration.  One of those things in my house is keeping my two little girls' hair combed!  Five year old Melody had really long hair which was so hard to detangle, even with the spray liquid, that some days I didn't bother at all.  Yep, negligent mommy!  Yep, guilt feelings, especially when I had to tote this scraggly orphan child off to the grocery store to pick up an emergency supply of whatever we just ran out of!  But, I would say in my defense, I don't like to hear her cry.   Poor child.  So my husband Thad suggested that I cut most of it off -- with a pixie cut!  Well, I didn't go quite that far, but let's see what I did do this afternoon. 

I didn't cut the bangs because we're hoping they grow out!  
Melody is happy with her new "do" as you can see!  She chortled with glee all the way through, taking several peeks in the mirror to check her progress.

It's already SO much easier to comb!  Happy mommy! 





I just have to tell a few other cute Melody stories while I'm writing this blog post. 

A few months ago she was in a really grumpy mood.  I was in the bathroom when, as kids will do when their mommies are finally in a quiet place for a few moments, Melody started banging loudly on the locked door.
 
"Can I TELL you something?" she yelled.

"Sure, Honey," I answered as I cracked open the door a bit.  "What do you want to say?"

"I DON'T KNOW!" she replied.  I giggled at her confusion, which only made matters worse.

"Stop LAUGHING at me!  Don't LOOK at me!" she roared.  So I dutifully turned the other way.  Then she marched over and planted herself directly in front of where I was facing. "Stop LOOKING at me!"  Well, what's a mommy supposed to do?  I have to confess that I laughed even harder!  Then I put her down for a nap.  Simple.  Practical.  Sanity.

Another time, one of her older sisters was trying to break Melody's habit of thumbsucking.  She found a little bottle of nasty tasting liquid that you're supposed to brush on the finger tips to deter a child from putting them in his or her mouth.  Lydia did this at bed time, telling Melody that is was a special kind of nail polish.  Early the next morning -- around 6, I think -- I could hear Melody wailing down the hallway, "I hate nail polish!  I HATE nail polish!"  Methinks the whole experience left a bad taste in her mouth.  But she still sucks her thumbs...

Come, weary moms!  Keep it simple!  And don't forget to laugh sometimes, even if you have to muffle it!

If you'd like to read other "Melody Moments" posts, click here.

If you want to see our "Home School Rules" that we're trying to work on each day to keep life simple, click here.

Or just poke around on this blog or my other ones listed below.  You never know what you might find!

Go in grace!

Virginia Knowles
www.ComeWearyMoms.blogspot.com
www.VirginiaKnowles.blogspot.com
www.StartWellHomeSchool.blogspot.com
www.ContinueWellHomeSchool.blogspot.com
www.FinishWellHomeSchool.blogspot.com

Mothering by Faith and Grace

"For no matter how many promises God has made, they are "Yes" in Christ. And so through him the "Amen" is spoken by us to the glory of God. Now it is God who makes both us and you stand firm in Christ. He anointed us, set his seal of ownership on us, and put his Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.  I call God as my witness that it was in order to spare you that I did not return to Corinth.  Not that we lord it over your faith, but we work with you for your joy because it is by faith you stand firm." 2 Corinthians 1:20-24

Paul wrote this to the Corinthian church.  Yes, they had serious problems.  Yes, he had to confront them firmly and exhort them to turn away from their sin.  And yet, he lead with grace, full of confidence that God was at work their lives.  His letter to them was positive and uplifting, calling them to their best by faith.  

As parents, we must not "lord it over" our children, as if anything God would want to say to them has to come through us.  This is especially true in adolescence and young adulthood.  Instead, we come alongside them and work with them for their joy.  We bring them to Jesus, who alone can save them, and then we help  them to establish and grow in  their own identity in Christ.  We show them how to discern between right and wrong, without acting as if our own house rules (as helpful as they might be) are equal to Scripture in authority.  Legalism will not transform their hearts!  By our own example, we must demonstrate walking in the power of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to hear his voice in their own hearts.  We will not always be there to tell them what to do, but he will.  We can not force them to do the right thing (even if we can control their outward actions for a moment) but he can make them want to do it and give them the ability to do it.

Do you really want your children to stand firm?  Then teach them to lean on God and not on you.  And that takes mothering by faith and grace.  That's where he wants you anyway!

Many blessings,
Virginia Knowles
http://www.comewearymoms.blogspot.com/

"Teaching Our Children to Walk With God" by Shiela Catanzarite

Dear friends,

How about some real encouragement today!  Jeannie Fulbright (http://www.jeanniefulbright.com/) sent this article out in her Jeannie's Journal newsletter a couple of years ago, and I recently found the copy I had printed out for my notebook.  The author, Shiela Catanzarite, has graciously given me permission to share this with you.  I asked Shiela for a little bit of information on her family, and she wrote: "We live in the Atlanta area and are part of a large homeschool group called CHEER. We've homeschooled for 8 years and have two daughters who will be in 7th and 6th grade this year. My husband is Bruce, and we are members of Perimeter Church. Bruce and I met in Russia where we were missionaries with the CoMission."

Read carefully -- there are so many nuggets of truth in this goldmine!

Teaching Our Children to Walk With God

by Shiela Catanzarite
bcatanzarite@yahoo.com

When your children leave home and you have fulfilled the call to train them up in the way in which they should go, what fruit will be evident in their lives? What overriding qualities will they possess? In what ways will they be equipped to fulfill the call God has on their lives?

Think of the amount of time you invest in your children. How is it spent? For most families today, much time is invested in pursuing extracurricular activities for their children. After all, shouldn’t they have the best education and the advantage in sports? Shouldn’t they possess a proficiency in music and a “well rounded” personality, among other things? Off we go, researching schools, music teachers and sports programs in order to ensure that our children have the best possible instruction available. We take them to social events and special outings, not wanting them to miss out on any enrichment opportunity being offered. We spend our afternoons and weekends driving to and fro, believing (or at least hoping) that we are giving our children the very best, leaving no activity unattended, no opportunity un-pursued. But in the long run, in light of eternity, will our children really be better off? To be sure, investing time in these areas is important. God has created each of our children unique and we should be good stewards of their gifts, passions and talents. But when the day is done, what will matter most in their lives? Which investment will truly enable them to “walk in a manner worthy of their calling?”

Undoubtedly, teaching our children to know and walk with God is the most important investment we can make in their lives, for the Lord says, “Let not a wise man boast of his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast of his might, let not a rich man boast of his riches; but let him who boasts boast of this, that he understands and knows Me, that I am the Lord who exercises lovingkindness, justice, and righteousness on earth; for I delight in these things,” declares the Lord." Jeremiah 9:23-24

God’s priority for our children is for them to know Him personally~to know His lovingkindness, His character~to walk with Him all the days of their lives. As mothers, it is vital that we invest time in helping our children to know the Lord and nurture their relationship with Him. But how do we do this? In what practical ways can we teach our children to walk with God? Here are 5 suggestions:

1. Model for them what it means to know and seek God

Growing up in a home with a mother who has as her priority to know and walk with God is invaluable to the spiritual nurture of her children, for she cannot impart to them what she, herself, does not possess. Ps. 27: 4 says, “One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek: That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord and to meditate in His temple.” There is nothing that will make a more significant spiritual impression on the hearts of your children than for them to see you seeking this “one thing,” to observe you beholding the beauty of the Lord in your own life. In the busyness of home and family preparations, it’s easy to get distracted from our relationship with the Lord, but it is essential that we take time each day to sit at the Lord’s feet and listen to His word, for He Himself says that it is the only thing that is really necessary (Luke 10:42). When our children remember us, may they call to mind a godly example of a mother whose priority was to know and seek God.

2. Involve them in your walk with God

Part of the exhortation to parents in Deuteronomy 6:4-7 includes sharing our own walk with God. You see, if His teachings are upon our hearts, then we will naturally share them with our children as we walk along the way. Talk about what God is doing in your own life, sharing the specific promises and scriptures with which He is encouraging you. Let your children in on your prayer requests so they can rejoice with you as they observe God’s faithfulness to answer; and be sure to model repentance and ask for their forgiveness when needed. What a gift it will be to your children if you give them the opportunity to share in your walk with God. In this, they will experience, alongside of you, what it means to truly know Him.

3. Teach them to hear and follow the Shepherd’s voice

Most of us can remember at least one time when our children, in response to our instruction, asked, “But, why mom?” in which we emphatically replied, “Because I said so, that’s why!” The issue at hand is not “because I said so” but “because God said so.” As our children mature, they need to learn to go directly to the Lord for instruction for He is their ultimate authority. As moms, we have the privilege of taking them to God’s Word and teaching them to seek out His truths for themselves. Begin by choosing a book of the Bible. Each day, read a passage out loud with your children and ask questions, modeling how to dig deeper into the truths of God‘s Word. Pray for wisdom and insight into what the truths mean. Spend time thanking God for what He has shown you, asking Him to weave these truths into your hearts and lives. Discuss practical applications. When your children are ready, have them read passages silently from their own Bibles. Then give them an opportunity to share which verses were particularly meaningful to them. This encourages them to glean their own insights and excites them as they hear the Lord speak directly to their hearts. Don’t forget to highlight for them scriptures that God spoke to you about. Begin simply and as they mature, introduce more formal Bible study methods and aids. “My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me.” John 10:27. Teaching your children to not only hear the Shepherd’s voice, but follow Him, is one of the greatest ways to nurture their walks with God.

4. Pray with them and for them

My husband and I pray over our children every night. We weren’t far into parenthood before we realized that our confidence in them becoming all God wanted them to be depended on God’s faithfulness and not our parenting. Yes, He uses us as parents but the greater spiritual work to be accomplished in our children’s hearts and lives is wrought through prayer. What a privilege we have been given! Praying the Scriptures over our children is powerful. In addressing the issue of spiritual warfare in the life of the believer, Paul gives this exhortation in Ephesians 6:18, “With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints.” Our prayers for our children are vital for their spiritual protection. Choose specific scriptures to pray that address struggles or needs in their lives or ones that portray godly qualities you want to see adorning them. When your children are suffering anxiety or are experiencing need, pray with them. Take them to God’s Word and find promises that address their hurts and fears. Pray these promises over them. Write down requests that you are praying for them in your own prayer journal. When answers come, write them down next to the request and show your children how God answered. They will know how deeply you love them, and they will know how intimately involved and interested God is in the details of their lives. Wise is the mother who builds the heritage of prayer in the life of her children. Taking them to the throne of God will accomplish more in nurturing their walks with Him than could ever be accomplished through any effort of your own.

5. Encourage them to journal

Many of the deeply spiritual Christians we admire have kept a journal of some kind. Whether it is a record of prayer requests, reflections from time in the scriptures or simply a pouring out of your heart to God, journaling is a wonderful way to enrich your walk with the Lord. In Psalm 25, David “journals” his heart-thoughts to God. “To Thee, O Lord, I lift up my soul. O my God, in Thee I trust.” David’s prayer continues as he petitions God, praises Him, and affirms his trust in God’s character. David’s thoughts continue to be deeply encouraging to believers today. What a treasure it would be to our children if we encouraged them to begin journaling while they are young. It can be as simple as writing one verse and a prayer or thanking God for a special event that happened in the day. It’s another way to encourage our children to communicate with God, to build their relationship with Him and to strengthen their faith. What a blessing it would be for them to leave home with a chronicle of God’s faithfulness to them throughout their childhood. What confidence it would build in trusting God with their future!



I’ve often thought how different my children’s lives would be if I daily maintained as my priority to deeply know and walk with God~how much more joy and peace they would experience~what a more faithful example they would have to follow. How many times, through tears, I’ve told them that I wish I could be a perfect mommy, that I so wish I could love them perfectly. Then I realize if I could, they would never have the need nor opportunity to seek and know the One who can and does love them perfectly~the One who will never leave them or forsake them~the One who has a special future and hope for their lives. So here is my opportunity, my calling as a mother: to lead them to the Savior, to the One who has created them and redeemed them, the One who has called them for a purpose, the only One who can fill them “with the knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so that [they] may walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, to please Him in all respects, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God, strengthened with all power, according to His glorious might, for the attaining of all steadfastness and patience; joyously giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified [them] to share in the inheritance of the saints in light.” Colossians 1:9-12. Teaching our children to walk with God in this way requires sacrifice. It requires a faithful investment of our time. It requires saying no to good things so that we can pursue what is best. Is it worth it? Absolutely! Eternally worth it.


~~~

Thanks, Shiela!


If you would like to read more about the topic of prayer as it relates to mothering our children, click here: Blog posts about prayer on Come Weary Moms

Blessings,
Virginia Knowles

What Are You Looking For?

Dear friends,

This morning one of my adult daughters called me, needing some information for a medical test she was about to have.  I could tell from her voice that she was a bit stressed out about it, so I promised to pray for her.   I don't usually do this, but I went into my bedroom, closed the door, and knelt in front of my rocking chair, leaning forward.   A few moments later, my nine year old daughter Naomi walked in and asked, "What are you looking for?"  She must have thought I lost my tweezers in the crack of the chair or something.  But it was a good question anyway.  It made me think, "What was I looking for in prayer?"  The answer?  Peace, health, and help for my precious daughter.

I am trying to become more faithful in praying regularly for each of my children.  I pray for each of them often as I think of them, but I would like to be more intentional, so I decided to pray for two of them (and older one and a younger one) more in-depth each day -- Mary and Andrew on Monday, Julia and Micah on Tuesday, etc.  I'm not always faithful with this, but that's my goal.

My teenage son is reading the biography of the great missionary to China, Hudson Taylor, for this English assignment.  Raised in a devout Christian home with much Bible reading and prayer, Hudson somehow managed to stray from the faith during his teen years while working at the bank.  An eye ailment forced him to return home for months for recovery.  During this time, he happened to pick up an evangelistic booklet, promising himself that he would only read the interesting story at the beginning and then set it down when it got to the inevitable religious part.  However, he was so fascinated that he forgot and read the whole thing.  The Holy Spirit worked in his heart to trust in Christ's finished work on the cross for his salvation.  Unbeknownst to Hudson, his mother, who had been away for weeks visiting her sister, had been gripped with a desire to pray fervently for her son that very day.  After several hours of praying, a sense of peace came over her and she was certain her son had become a Christian.  Some time later, he mistakenly picked up his younger sister Amelia's notebook, thinking it was his own, and read a notation that she had been praying every day for his salvation for a month prior to his conversion.

Hudson Taylor became quite a prayer warrior himself.  A few of his quotes on prayer...

"I have found that there are three stages in every great work of God: first, it is impossible, then it is difficult, then it is done."

"Do not have your concert first, and then tune your instrument afterwards. Begin the day with the Word of God and prayer, and get first of all into harmony with Him."

"You must GO forward on your knees."

Want to read more quotes about prayer from the saints of yesteryear?  Click here: Got Prayer?

Dear fellow mothers, let us pray for our children!

Read: Amy Carmichael's poem "A Parent's Prayer" along with some Scriptures and ideas for what to pray about here "Praying for Your Children."

Read: "A Mother's Seeds" poem.

Blessings,

Virginia Knowles

http://www.comewearymoms.blogspot.com/