Friday, May 20, 2011

Friday Favorites #7 - and Emerging from the Fog

Dear friends,

When I stepped out the door this morning to go on my walk with my old friend and fellow blogger Tonya, I was mystified because of the mist -- the fog -- that enveloped my neighborhood.  Fog in Florida?  Pretty rare!  I lived near San Francisco for many years and visited Scotland for a summer, so I've seen plenty fog before -- but not much here in sunny Orlando!  It was actually a bit refreshing, even lovely, and I snapped a few pictures with my iPod camera.  It's funny that I thought the sun was the moon, because its light was so obscured by the fog.  Tonya assured me that it was, indeed, the sun!

As Tonya and I walked, we were musing about the fog, and I told her that I've often shared with other moms how my years of mothering babies and toddlers was like a two decade long fog for me.  I got pregnant with my first baby in September 1986 and weaned my tenth baby in the spring of 2006, so I pretty much was pregnant or nursing for 20 years with only a dozen scattered months "off" during the whole time.  With the constant physical demands and the lack of sleep, it just does something to the brain cells.  I felt like I was in a fog of just getting through the daily stuff.  It's only been in the last five years that I've really started to emerge from that and "come into my own."  

I'm not saying I was mentally dead for all those years.  In fact, as I said to Tonya, it is the fact that I was actively reading and writing (2 books and a global e-magazine!) and talking to other moms that kept me going until that season of life was over for me.  I am so grateful for that.  It's actually still what keeps me sane, since I still have so many demands with a full house and the noise and mess that entails.  The years do pass.  Children do grow up.  Of my ten children, five daughters are now adults or almost adults: my oldest is married and has a son of her own, my second is planning her wedding for this fall, the next two are preparing to return to college after a few months in Italy, and the fifth daughter is excelling as a sophomore in her first year of public high school after 10 years of being home schooled.  But I do still have five very active younger kids, including a daughter in kindergarten who will graduate from high school when I am almost 60!  Oy!

Back to the reading... I get my daily dose of encouragement on my iPod from several blogs that I subscribe to via Google Reader.  Now I'm going to share my weekly culling of the best of these blog posts with you for Friday Favorites in hopes that they might be a source of manna to you who are still in the years of mothering young children (and older ones, too)! 
These posts are mostly about grace in parenting, which fits this post since part of the fog of motherhood was that of trying to meet up to everyone else's expectations and live by their rules instead of walking in the grace of what God had for our family.

Blessings and grace,
Virginia Knowles

Parenting 001 by Kevin DeYoung -- Let's lay down the perfectionism, shall we?

The Lifted-Veil Life  by Karen Campbell at -- As moms, are we living in our liberty in Christ -- or behind the veil of legalism?  “But even to this day, when Moses is read, a veil lies on their heart. Nevertheless when one turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. Now the Lord is the Spirit; and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.” ~ 2 Corinthians 3:15-18

Desperate Mothers from Practical Theology for Women I have a lot of techniques and strategies. For the wrong job. I know how to manage a day. But I do not know how to transform a heart. I am learning that it's quite reasonable that I don't know how to change my boys' hearts, because it's not my job anyway."

Wife-style more dated than the 1950s... Part 2 by Ginny Jacobson at  Making the Most of Every Opportunity  "I’m praying that regardless of how I may be labeled (1950's wife, legalist, crazy, etc.), God will continue to give me a desire to know Him more and live in light of Him. And I’m praying others will desire to know Him more and lay down their lives daily in these little (and big) ways to show His love. Imagine if we all stopped comparing/labeling and instead lived for Him and not ourselves…"  Note: Ginny's family attends the church we left last year.  Her husband Andy is on staff with Campus Crusade for Christ.  I have never met her, but she apparently looks a lot like me and has been mistaken for me at times.  Her blog is an encouragement to me, too!

I Am Not My Parents at Permission to Live ( -- this blog is written by a young mom (and pastor's wife) who was raised in a legalistic, abusive home schooling family, and wants better for her own children.  Note: I may not agree with everything she writes, especially about theology, but her perspective is helpful to me.

Sanctifying Motherhood from The MOB Society (Mothers of Boys) You see, as I parent, I am training my children to know what is right and wrong, yes. I want them to love what is good and hate what is evil, I want to guide them in the path of righteousness. But more and more I find that I am the often the object of sanctification in this relationship – often they are not being sinful, they are being children. am the one who is in the wrong. I am the one seeking forgiveness. I am the one who has failed to rein in my tongue and temper and frustration."

Heart Rules from The MOB Society So one day we discard the house rules that have been taped to my wall for awhile~ rip them up and throw them in the trash. He thinks it’s funny, and I explain to him that I’ve been focused on all the wrong things. Instead of house rules, we are now going to have heart rules."


  1. Thanks so much for mentioning the MOB Society friend! One small tweak? The post above (Sanctifying Motherhood) is actually written by Kristi Stephens. It looks like it's me because it's a guest post, and all of those fall under my name.

    Be blessed Mama!

  2. Thanks, Brooke! I just changed it! I shoulda noticed that already - but hey, I'm not the perfect momma yet! :-)

  3. Great blog. The spider photo turned out pretty well!


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